Jaroslav Halak Suffers Sean Avery Imitation from Own Teammate

It’s one thing for Sean Avery to swing his stick or fists at an opposing goalie’s head.  But even Avery wouldn’t swing at his own goalie!  (he wouldn’t, would he?)

Tomas Surovoy (except for an obituary this should be the last you read of him) swung his stick at Jaroslav Halak’s head after the goalie gave up a goal in Slovakia’s game against the Czech Republic in the IIHF World Championship going on in Switzerland.  Czech-Slovak games are tough enough without players turning on each other.

Watch Halak’s response after the swing.  Either he is an incredibly easy going guy or he is just so stunned that he has no idea how to react.  He probably thought it was a Czech player and was looking to his teammate for help!  It may be tough playing in Montreal but at least there you only have to deal with the viciousness of your own fans.

And how about those announcers?  Can someone who speaks Slovakian please translate for me?  The tone in their voice sounds like they’re watching paint dry!  Their goalie just took an axe chop to the head and they have the reaction of Eyore on a rainy day!

UPDATE:  Apparently the broadcast is Finnish and not Slovakian.  Would they have shown more emotion if it had been a Swedish goalie facing the axe?

Varlamov Figures Out Avery — Wins Nobel Peace Price

Sean Avery strikes a familiar pose in front of an opposing goalie.

Sean Avery strikes a familiar pose in front of an opposing goalie.

After much bitching and moaning on my part about the goalie-rousing antics of Sean Avery, a young Russian who speaks almost no English has turned the tables on the pestilent Ranger.  Turns out speaking very little English is one of the keys to combating Avery’s antics in front of the net.  That, along with a quick little chop to Avery’s nether region, got under Avery’s skin (along with his protective cup) and resulted in Avery getting kicked out of the game!

This YouTube video is the best way to watch Simeon Varlamov’s response.  Color commentator Ray Ferraro is none too impressed with Avery’s punch to the goalie’s head but fails to mention anything about Varlamov’s upper cut with his stick.  Watch for it at the 39 second mark.

Asked afterward what Avery was saying in his verbal attack, the Russian goalie pleaded ignorance saying you’d have to ask his defenseman because he didn’t understand Avery’s English.

So goalies take note, the best way to deal with Avery or someone like him (if there is anyone like him) is to forget your English, turn the other cheek and have a quick wrist on your stickhand.

Sean Avery At It Again

Sean Avery was up to his old tricks tonight in Washington, pestering Jose Theodore on a number of occasions.  I see Alexander Ovechkin jumping on the glass and his teammates to celebrate goals… why doesn’t he jump on Avery?

Avery is at it again. Goalies of the world unite in ending his reign of stupidity.

Avery is at it again. Goalies of the world unite in ending his reign of stupidity.

If all the goalies of the world chipped in $1 I’m sure we could hire Tonya Harding to take a crowbar to his knees.  Tonya gets out of debt and no longer needs to step in the ring to make money and goalies everywhere never have to see Avery again.

Sean Avery vs. the Syracuse Bulldogs

After doing this to Marty Brodeur in last season’s playoffs:

Avery started talking smack to Hendrik Lundqvist in his return to MSG the other night:

Until Brandon Dubinsky came to Lundqvist’s aid:

What I’d really like to see is Avery face off against this lineup:

Ogie Oglethorpe, Screaming Buffalo and Dr. Hook McCracken.  That ought to teach a few manners to Avery about how he should treat goalies.

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